For a long time I didn’t see myself represented and have spent most of my life trying to figure out where I fit in. But now, three decades later, I finally found my place in the quiet chaos, in the quirky giggles, and in the clumsy brilliance of being an awkward black girl.

This blog will become my safe space to unpack, reflect and laugh. Where I will talk about my experiences, interests and random thoughts. 

I used to think something was wrong with me. Having grown up in a predominantly white neighborhood, and not looking like anyone else and then went to a culturally diverse middle school, where I finally found more people that looked like me but to me it was a new territory. I missed a lot of the cultural aspects of the black culture and tried hard to behave, talk and dress a certain way. Which, in itself, is also problematic since the Black Experience is not a monolith but that is a story for another day.

Both experience felt like masking to me. I had my interests. Was a big Kpop fan, loved anime, enjoyed playing video-games. But I kept to myself. My own little secret, the real me I made sure stayed hidden, because it felt too embarrassing to be honest about it. Afraid to receive backlash or be laughed at by my peers. It is kind of sad but back then I felt like I was “too much” and at the same time, “not enough. but now I can just laugh about it (thank God).

Turning 30 really hit different. It made me reflect on how much time I spent and have wasted to shrink myself to fit other people’s boxes. And honestly, I am tired of that sh*t. I want to be nerdy, curious, awkward, soft, girly. All the things that make me, me. And if I have to claim this corner of the internet to hold space for that? So be it, who cares anyway?

I am no writer and have never been good at expressing my thoughts in words. So I apologize in advance, this blog won’t be perfect, but it will be real and unapologetic. Expects posts about overthinking life, gaming, anime, fashion, movies, girl and womanhood, healing, adulting, navigating identity and maybe, maybe a few posts about random things I love.

So…., if you have ever felt like the odd one out, or you are figuring life, one awkward step at a time. Welcome. You’re not alone. Let’s unpack, laugh and of embrace our cringe together.

Okay, enough rambling.

See you in the next post.

With love,

The Awkward Black Girl.